Tom is Away

working on draft 6. urgency happening.

syllabi complete. Junk uploaded to blackboard. already received an email from a student saying they won’t be in class tomorrow. Semester begins.

practicing, and winning, hypothetical arguments with the un-mustachioed asshole inspector. Frightening the dog, I think.

if there’s a positive here, it’s that 20 year old Tom would have maybe handled this whole situation irrationally and loudly. Almost 30 year old Tom is just internalizing his rage and bottling it up so that it can explode at an appropriate time.

It’s starting to feel like the borough of Barrington isn’t going to stop digging until I give them the fillings from my teeth.

(yes, it failed again).

Okay, so he doesn’t have a mustache like I remembered.  But all the other things I said about him stand.  And he has negburns.

If I don’t post something here by ~ 3 PM EST, it means I have killed a man, and I am on the run. Someone please feed my dog for me until the heat is off.

property reinspection at 1 PM today. Rain falling; if there’s any water in the basement, and he demands that I get a sump pump or something, I will drown him.

trying to finalize syllabi before lunchtime

$10 for all the man MAC & cheese I can eat. You may want to avert your eyes.

two days away from the start of classes, and I still don’t know how many students I have in one course (it’ll be somewhere between 20-35; dramatic impact on scheduling).

nothing else is allowed to break, ever again.

when I watch other teams play, I realize how much I hate the Eagles’ defense.

house officially turned over to the renters. Hoping we avoid disaster, for at least a while.

Thinking maybe it’s time to get a permit for Permit Acquisition

Muddy Waters was wrong.

Stressful day ahead, but by actual coincidence, Muddy Waters showed up this morning to reassure me via my ipod alarm:

The first fifteen seconds are the relevant part here

“Directions for fastening to wall: fasten to wall using appropriate fasteners. Fasteners not included.”

Dear Homeowner,

Upon reconsideration, it occurs to me that even though your home was deemed inhabitable BY ME just six years ago, and I have noted zero new concerns, it is in your best interest to pay the county another $50-$150 for the right to allow people inside your home; otherwise you will be in violation of the law, based on arbitrary decisions I just made right now. We’re just here to help!
Sincerely,

Some Asshole With a Greasy Mustache and A Comically Oversized Badge Considering the Job He Does

Dear homeowner:

Your home is deemed uninhabitable by renters because two of your stairs are squeaky and one of the boards on your deck is cracked.

Sincerely,

A. Dickhead.